My Sun or My Universe
by The Bedroom Writer
Summary: Bella has to picck between edward and Jacob.


The moment that Jacob had run away to fight I felt guilty, not because he was fighting for me one more ways than one. But because I was in love with him and he knew it. As I walked back to the tent, my only thought was of Edward. What would I say? What would I do? But eh most important thing was what would he do? Once I got to the tent I sank to the ground and tried to forget about what I had done, I tried to forget that I may have just killed my relationship with Edward in a mere 5 minutes. As time went on a through came into my mind, what if he left me? I started to breath heavily and my heart was beating as if trying to break through my chest. "Bella?" a voice asked, I didn't turn around I didn't need to I would know that voice anywhere. "Bella?" Edward repeated, I felt him sit down beside me but I didn't move until his hand came out to touch my check. I flinched away from him; I had no right to have him touch me. "Bella what's wrong? Did he hurt you" he asked concerned. I didn't say anything, how would I tell him that I had just cheating on him, how would I tell him that I had just kissed his enemy? "Please talk to me or even look at me" he pleaded. There was only one thing in this world that I couldn't stand, one was needles and the other was to here Edward in pain. But I was still scared to look up; he had gotten so good at reading my mind that I was afraid that he would be able to see the betrayal straight away. That he would see the guilt that was clearly tattooed on my face.

I turned my face unwillingly but I didn't look at him, "Bella look at me" he asked. "Please" he pleading. There it was again the pleading, I turned my face so that I was looking at him, "that's my girl" he said cradling my face in his hands. I looked up at him thinking that maybe this was going to be the last time that I ever saw him again, the last time that I would ever look into his eyes. I don't know what really came over me but I sat up faster then I normally would with Edward and wrapped my arms around his neck. Kissing Edward was nothing like kissing…I pulled away looking at his face, there was confusion in his eyes. I let go of him and ran out of the tent. When I was outside I took a deep breath and turned around, he was standing in the opening of the tent still looking confused as before, but now there was hurt there to. "I'm so sorry Edward, I never meant to hurt you" I whispered unable to finish the sentence. He began to walk slowly towards me, but I rised a hand telling him to stay back taking a step back as I did. "no don't" I said. "Bella what happened, please tell me…" he asked slowly. I ran my hands through my hair, tears beganing to fall already and I hadn't even said it out loud yet. "I…I…Jacob kissed me" I whispered quietly hoping that he hadn't heard it. But he had, he closed his eyes pinching his nose, "Is that all" he asked. I drew a jagged breath, "No…" I said, his eyes flashed open. "I kissed him back", Edwards face went from wary to hurt to heartbreak and then finally to blank in a matter of seconds and the nest thing I knew he was gone. I spun around on the spot, "Edward!!" I screamed out. "Edward!!" I screamed again falling to my knees.

I don't know how long I was on the ground for, just staring at the place that he had last been, when Alice's voice pulled me back to reality. "Bella? Where's Edward" she said touching my arm, but I didn't answer, I just looked at her face. "Carlisle is she alright?" she asked. Carlisle knelt down in front of me, "Bella happened?" he asked I tore my eyes away from Alice to look at him. I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out, I leant forward putting my head in his hard chest and began to cry, he wrapped his arms around me. "We should get her home" Esme said from behind us, "Jasper and I will take her" Alice said. Carlisle nodded, "You should carry her Jasper I don't think that she can walk" he said. Jasper reached out to take me in his arm; I buried my head into his crook of his neck and closing my eyes. Running with Jasper wasn't like running with Edward. Edward was smooth and fast where Jasper had a habit of changing direction at the last second that would cause me to throw around.

Charlie wasn't home when we got there, that was a good thing because my window was opened. "Will you be alright of we go?" Alice asked as Jasper set me down on the porch. I nodded letting myself in. When inside I placed my bag at the bottom of the stairs and walked up to my room. I turned on my light and turned toward the corner and there he was arms folded across his chest. "Tell me why" his voice was full of anger. I took a step toward him but he put a hand up, "stay there, I don't' want to hurt you, I just want to know why".

"I don't know why. It just happened" I said crying again. He would normally be rushing to my side when I cried but now he just stood there staring at me, "Do you love him?" he asked, I could hear the hurt in his voice. I looked down at the ground, when I didn't answer I was hurting him, I was hurting the most important thing in my life, he was my air, my moon, he was my whole universe. I walked across the room to stand in front of him; I placed my heads on each side of his face. I pulled it up so that he was looking at me; "No I don't love him" he nodded once looking back at the floor. I let my hands drop, 'what do we do now?" I asked him taking a step back. "I don't know. Would you think me unreasonable if I asked you never to see him again?" he asked, staring at me. He was basically saying it either me or him, when he asked that, my mind was playing a game of tug-a-war, Edward, Jacob, Edward, Jacob??? My universe of my son?? I knew which one I could not live without and the other was Jacob, he was the one that I owned so much. "Bella?" Edward asked. "Ok I won't see him ever again" I said slowly letting the fact of what I had just said sink in. I moved forward again to rub the purple shadows under his eyes, "are you thirsty?" I asked. "May be I should…" but his arms shot out and grabbed my waist, "don't even think about it" he said. Lowering his head to my level like he always did, he pressed his lips to mine. The kiss was like always careful and gentle, but like always my heart started to best fast when we reached the point where he would always pull away. But he just held me tighter crashing his lips still more against mine, I moaned as he ran his tongue over my bottom lip, my hands were in his hair holding on for dear life. His hands were roaming over my back and slowly began to move around to my stomach and up my shirt; I shivered as he touched the underside of my breasts. I felt my knees go weak as his thumb stroked the material of my bra; I took his hand pulling him to the bed, his lips not leaving mine. His breathing was slightly uneven as was mine; his lips were trailing down my neck sucking and nibbling the flesh and then as if my brain kicked back in gear, were we about to…? "Umm...Edward maybe we should stop for a moment" pulling away from him he looked confused at my action no doubt. "Maybe we should stop for a moment, cause we mightn't be able soon", I explained. He kissed my neck, "you don't want to?" he asked against my neck. I nodded at him, "Of course I do, but why now? What's changed" I asked, I could see that he was thinking about his answer. "I thought that I had lost you today, something that I vowed never to do again. It made me think that if I could give you what…he could then maybe you would stay." He answered tracing the pattern of my bed cover.

He had never been this open with me before, he normal kept all his doubts and fears hidden inside of him never letting them slip up at the worst of times. A tear rolled down my face, "How could you think that? There is no one else I want to be with more then you and when I give myself to someone I want that someone to be you and only you" I said rubbing his check. He stared at me for a moment then got off the bed, "What?" I asked but he held up a finger to tell me to be quite for a moment. He paced at the end of my bed for what felt like hours until he stopped. He made his way over to the bed kneeing beside it taking my hand, "Bella, will you marry me?" he asked. I knew what I should say, I should say no I mean I'm only 18, but my heart was yelling at me to say yes. I ran my hand through my hair, "Umm…" I said blankly staring at him still. His eyes were searching my face for any hint as to what I was thinking, say yes! Say yes! My heart was screaming at me. When I finally answered I was shock as to what I said, "Yes" I said nodded, "100 times yes!" I finally yelled jumping into his arms and pulling him into a passionate kiss. But he pulled away suddenly, "what?" I asked. "I don't have a ring…" he said looking at my left hand. I laughed "it doesn't matter, I would have said yes anyway" I said pulling him into a kiss once again.

The sun was up when Edward spoke again, we had spent the night laying in a comfortable silence. "I want to wait" he said randomly I looked up at him; "Wait for what?" I asked mystified. "I want to wait to sleep with you until the wedding night" he said shyly looking away, if he was human he would have been blushing. "Why?" I asked. He didn't answer, "Edward what's wrong?" I asked him turning his face toward me. He mumbled something that I didn't hear, "Edward honey you're going to have to speak up I can't hear you" I asked looking at him encouragingly. "I haven't done IT before" he said looking more shy then before, he ducked his head so that I couldn't see it. I had always thought, "You haven't ever, but I thought…" I tailed off. But he was already shaking his head, "not even close" he said. We lay in silence for a hair breath before I asked, "Why did you run away from me at the clearing today?" I asked. "True fully?" he said raising an eyebrow. I nodded at him. "I thought that you wanted him, I was heartbroken and for those few moments that I was running I hated you for doing that to me. I got home and I pack my stuff ready to leave because I knew that I wouldn't be able to see you and him together…but then I found a picture of us and knew that I had to fight. I may have been fighting a losing battle but I at least had to try and get you back. Because Bella you mean everything to me I wish that I could put into words how much I need you, how much I love you." She said. I reached up to touch his face, 'you don't need to tell me how much you love me, I know I have always known." I said reaching up to kiss him. He pulled away, "But I need to tell you Bella, I will fight for you I have waited 100 years for you I won' let you get away easy." "Edward, there is only one person that I want and who I need. There was never a reason to fight for me you are my life, I can't live without you." I said looking into his eyes. He pulled me into a kiss again and he whispered, "Forever" just as our lips touched.


End file.
